Oh Those Leather Pants!
by ClumsyCapitolUnicorn
Summary: Haymitch.Effie.Leather pants. How does this work out? Inspired by Rumples famous leather pants on OUAT and I wrote this after someone asked how Effie would react if Haymitch donned these pants. Rated T because this could carry on. Dedicated to the Hayffie Tag on Tumblr.
1. Haymitch the Victor in Leather Pants?

"Effie, I am NOT trying on these Capitol fancy dress crap, I am not a clown",says an irritated Haymitch, not liking shopping in the Capitol stores one bit. Not liking shopping with Effie one bit.

"Haymitch!", says Effie In her clearly high-pitched-upset-capitol-accent. "These are not clown clothes. They are beautiful and bright, unlike the scruffy clothes your wearing. I am doing you a favour anyway"Now, I want you to find something to wear and try it on... and let me see you in it",says Effie, clearly annoyed with Haymitch's insult about the clothes her people wear. What was wrong with Capitol clothing? They are bright, cheerful and the sleeves and patterns make a wonderful statement to people. She will make sure that drunken fool walks out the store with at least two new shirts and a decent pair of pants.

Effie went to look at the purpled clothed section of the was admiring the ruffled top with sleeves,that had two delicate cuts in, to show skin a bit without looking too over the top. It was so beautiful, so purple, so her.

Haymitch watched the Capitol woman pick up the ridiculous purple top and saw her walking to the counter to a cashier, who was wearing ridiculous shades of green. He even had light gold skin. It hurt Haymitch's eyes looking at the cashier.

He kept looking around, hoping to find something that wasn't too crazy and bright. Yes! There on the rack were a pair of black leather jeans. He looked at the label, they were just his size. He was a bit skinny on the waist, but they would fit. He picked them up and went to the men changing rooms, accidentally tripping into an orange-faced Capitol man, who eyed Haymitch judgingly, then at the pants. Rolling his eyes, Haymitch went to the first empty room and closed the door.

Effie was picking at her nails, waiting for Haymitch to get out the changing rooms, so she could go back to their games suite and look at her schedule list. If he didn't hurry up, she would go in there and drag him out. That was not good mannered. It was just a thought in Effie's head because she was tired and didn't have good patience.

"Ok Princess, these pants are ok,can we go now?", Effie heared a voice say.

She looked up. Haymitch, the drunken victor, was wearing...LEATHER PANTS!

LEATHER PANTS, Haymitch was wearing leather pants. It shocked Effie because they showed so much on Haymitch's legs. So much muscle actually. When he turned around in a sarcastic twirl, she caught a nice view.

_Wow...he, he has a nice...Effie no, don't go there, wow is bum. EFFIE! Bad manners. His bum though. I can see the muscle everywhere. _

Effie wished her head would shut up. But that was hard, considering the nice view the pants were giving her. He did have a nice...

"Princess, have you finished yet?"

His voice made her jump from her thoughts and staring.

"Ugh, scuse me?", She asked, trying not to blush. But no, the heat was already on her cheeks. The make-up would not save the embarrassment.

"You keep looking at me, are you drooling too?" ,he said with a grin on his face.

Effie went to wipe her mouth, no drool.

"Just kidding Princess, but..." he said, walking to her in those fabulous pants. "You seem to be going a bit red". He poked her cheek lightly with his finger.

This was not helping.

"I caught you looking at my backside too sweetheart" he said, smirking like an idiot.

"I...I wouldn't do such..such..", Effie stuttered, failing to finish her explanation.

"Well, I have more reason to get these then sweetheart if your going to be goggling at my backside", he says, deliberately twirling around, making sure to strut slowly in the pants.

"I bet your watching me walk away sweetheart", he said a bit loudly.

"No I am not Haymitch",croaked Effie.

_Liar!_

She watched him walk-strut away, in those sexy leather pants. She hoped he wouldn't wear them around her, but she hoped he would. Effie was confused. But she did love those pants.


	2. Splash!

**Hey, Thanks for reviewing guys! I love that you love this and I hope to write more chappies for you guys. Anyways, chapter two for you guys. **

They were walking through the Capitol coloured crowd, trying to get to their games suite. Effie couldn't walk without getting a few sneaky peeks at those leather tease pants.

Everytime Haymitch moved, the pants showed everything of Haymitch's _nice_ back view. Effie was telling herself not to stare, but they were like one of those attractive sparkly outfits that District 5 wore last year. She felt like a moth to a flame. Knowing how dangerously close she was, but still moving closer.

Effie felt leather in her hand. She looked to her hand and saw that she was holding the back of Haymitch's leather pants.

_WHAT, HOW DID MY HAND END UP THERE? _Effie's brain was screaming at her.

Haymitch must have stopped while she was too busy daydreaming and she must of bumped into him, hand first onto the pants.

"I know I'm to hot NOT to handle Princess, but can you save that until we get back?", said Haymitch, winking at her and eyeing where her hand was, still.

She cringed, took her hand off of him and started to walk fast. She was speeding in her heels and was looking at the back of her at Haymitch, when her shoulder hit something hard.

She didn't get to see the face of who she bumped into, as she felt herself fly across and landed into the wishing pool that was built as sign of peace from the dark days.

She pulled herself up, feeling wet and weighed down, the water running down her clothes and face.

She looked to the left and saw a smirking Haymitch walking over with his hand out.

"Wow Princess, you landed so gracefully, I might give you a score of nine and a half though, your clothes aren't made for water", he said, laughing. Effie gave him her I-am-not-liking-you-right-now face and grabbed his hand.

She grabbed to hard onto his hand through anger, accidentally pulling him to her. He fell onto her, splashing water out of the wishing pool, onto the white tiled floor.

They both walked into the elevator, leaving water trails coming from their clothing and shoes.

"Guess I won't need to shower later, got a nice soak", said Haymitch, not feeling embarrassed or annoyed about what happened in the wishing pool.

"Haymitch, I swear,your going to wish you learned how to fight an escort, cause you won't be the same once I am through with you", snarled Effie, through her teeth.

"Kitty,put those nails away and cool it, it's only water" said an amused Haymitch.

"I embarrassed myself infront of nearly the entire Capitol Citizens and you think I should cool it?", screeched Effie.

"It's your fault, you and your stupid pants and-"

"Oh, what did my pants do to you sweetheart...wait, is this cause you were checking me out in them. I know you were, did you like what you saw?", said Haymitch, walking to her until they were nose to nose.

He ran his fingers through Effie's wig, then pulled it off.

"Hey, give it-",screeched Effie, getting cut off.

"Nope, you can see your blonde hair anyway sweetheart, you sure you'd rather wear this ratty wet thing?". He dropped it to the floor.

Effie looked into his eyes, ready to stare this fool down. But her bad luck struck again,as she felt herself smouldered by those grey bright eyes.

Then...she felt hands at her waist, pushing her to the wall of the elevator.

His mouth was tackling hers before she could react to the situation. It took her seconds to reply to his lips on hers. She kissed him fierce, tasting as much liquour as she could. It was burny and refreshing all in one.

The elevator doors moved open.

He pulled from her and ran his hand through his hair. He bent down to pick up her wig, yet again showing her his back view, not wanting to miss this little show, Effie took a peek, then looked away when he turned, giving her the pink tattered wig.

He walked out before her into the sweet, turning to wink at her.

**So, is this chappy good or not?, do what you gotta do and leave me some reviews :).**


	3. What in the name of Panem!

**Note: I hope you have liked this fic so far. I haven't really done a full fic before, this is my accomplishment haha. Anyways, enjoy.**

_Your a very bad woman Effie Trinket. If your parents saw you, they'd be locking you up, never again to see anyone. You don't just stick your tongue down a guys throat, wearing leather or not. It's not proper...and you made out with FREAKING HAYMITCH ABERNATHY, out of all guys you could kiss in the girl you need-_

Effie's inner brain scolding was stopped by the entrance of Haymitch Abernathy, coming out of his room, wearing a white t-shirt, three buttons open, giving Effie a view of his chest. He was wearing the _dang pants_ still. His hair, was all shiny and sticking out from where Effie had scrunched it up in their mini, but clearly heated make-out,plus when he got it wet falling in the pool. Oh gosh. Effie mentally slapped herself because of her thoughts on how great his hair felt between her fingers.

Haymitch sat down,robotic-like, onto the sofa across Effie. Effie heard the pants squeak a bit as he sat.

_Why is he still wearing those flipping sexy pants?_

It is not fair. Effie was not going to survive long in the room with _him _and his _pants._

"Just take them off and be done with them ok!",said Effie.

"Well Princess, round two already?, you are very energetic, I have to say. But I can't get them off. Guess you'll have to just stare at them, unless you help me take them off?"

Haymitch smirked at her,tapping his knee's on purpose for the terrible torture.

"What do you mean you can't take them off?...they are just pants" she said, not enjoying herself anymore.

"Well, the water and sweat kinda made them sticky...and now I am stuck in them"

"FINE, I'LL HELP, BUT PLEASE, JUST GET SOMETHING TO COVER YOURSELF!", screeched Effie, very loudly.

"Oh, Princess, you seem too desperate to get me out of my pants,and I have no shame, just take them off...and try not to pretend that you don't enjoy the view Princess...I feel honoured that you take a liking to my body". Haymitch said, smirking and winking, like a moron he is.

"I shall not be taking any pleasure on removing your pants Haymitch, don't get to happy. I have manners and I refuse to look at anything what so ever. Now,are you going to make it difficult, or will you get a towel or something and make my day worth going through?",Effie said, trying to not splutter out her calm request.

He put a finger on his lip and look in the distance for a second.

"Hmmm...nope, I like seeing you squirm Princess...and I thought I already made your day worth going through, considering your excitement in the elevator", he said, smirking and wiggling his eyebrows.

Effie gave him her angry inpatient look, not wanting to say more.

"Ok, lets be off with these bad boys then", he said.

Effie awkwardly moved her hands round, deciding where to put them so she can pull off the pants.

She pulled out the bottom a bit, feeling her cheeks warm as she felt the pants slide down a bit.

She managed to pull them over his feet, but they still needed to be pulled off. Effie started tugging harder, leaning down on the ground while Haymitch sat there awkwardly,yet grinning at her, obviously amused that she was sitting on the ground.

She started tugging even harder, and then...

The weight of Haymitch was on her before she saw the pants fling off to the ground.

He was lying on the top off her, his face to hers. His eye's looking into hers.

The door slided open, revealing a brunette and blonde walking in, their mouths open and eyes wide at what they saw. They're mentor and escort lying on the floor. Both wet. One pantless.

_What in the name of Panem do we do now? _

**Ohhhhh, Peeta and Katniss caught em on the floor...oopsy, they seem scared. Anyone wanting chapter 4 yet?**


	4. Victor makes out with a Cotton Candy

**A/N: Sorry for the wait and I for the wrongly spelled words. I know how to spell, just that I rush and end up not spelling it right. Anyway, here's chapter 4.**

Effie had been taught how to act in public and how to avoid situations politely. They never did tell her how to get out of a situation where she was with a drunk victor in his underwear though.

Katniss and Peeta had been in The Hunger Games, the worst possible life threatnening thing possible. Yet here they were, wearing scared expressions, as if she and Haymitch were the muttations they had encountered.

Katniss was the first to finally speak. "Do victors and escorts do this for a tradition, or are you two just making up from all the fights?". She was making a joke. A rude one, yet it obviously was because she was uncomfortable.

Peeta was currently interested in his shoes. _Thank gosh one of them is polite enough_, Effie thought. "Oh please take a picture sweetheart, maybe you could show The Capitol it's first ever scandal. I can picture the headlines right now: Victor makes out with a living cotton candy," said Haymitch, not phased at all. That comment took Effie out of her shock.

"COTTON CANDY? WHAT IN THE NAME OF PANEM DO YOU MEAN, COTTON CANDY? I REFUSE FOR YOU TO INSULT ME RIGHT NOW. I AM DISGUSTED THAT YOU COULD EVEN THINK ABOUT MAKING A PASS AT ME, IT'S BEYOND UNGENTLEMAN-LIKE AND YOU ARE SOBER TO KNOW WHAT YOU WERE DOING, SO DON'T EVEN GO THERE-" "Princess-," Cut in Haymitch, but he was not heard. "-DON'T EXPECT ME TO LET YOU EVEN GET AWAY WITH THIS ABERNATHY,I REFUSE FOR YOU TO THINK IT'S OK TO SEDUCE ME WITH THOSE LEATHER PANTS AND-," "EFFIE TRINKET, FREAKING HECK WOMAN, WILL YOU SHUT YOUR TRAP, THE KIDS HAVE LEFT," Haymitch yelled.

Effie stopped her yelling, looking at a wild-looking Haymitch. The kids had indeed left. Oh gosh, they must of been ashamed of her, with her yelling and inaproppriate appearance.

With that thought it mind, she inspected herself. Her wig had fallen to the floor, one shoe with it, and her right sleeve had been torn.

She then looked at Haymitch, who was standing in his underwear, along with his top and socks.

She looked away from him, blushing because she'd never been in the presence of a half dressed man in his underwear before.

"Well well, Effie Trinket, you certainly have got a right pair of wondering eye's, or a woman of your type of..._class_," said Haymitch, wearing a huge grin.

He grabbed her waist and she was about to scold him, before he shushed her. "Dammit woman, I'm only helping you up, keep your paranoid thoughts to yourself," he said. She let him pull her up from the ground.

"I-I'll just go sort myself out," whispered Effie. "You go do that sweetheart," said Haymitch. She walked off to her room, leaving Haymitch on his own.

_Why did she think I was seducing her? I was just kidding, I don't like her or find her attractive in anway possible. Yeah, she looks better without those huge cotton things on her head, but I don't like her at all. _

**Oh, this went smooth didn't it. You don't like her Haymitch, are you sure? Anyone want me to include a bit more Haymitch inner thought's in the next chapter? Did you like it? -Uni**


End file.
